Friday, April 24, 2009


I received this email this morning from a guy I’ve been corresponding with regularly for a few years now:

“You are being unnecessarily rough on yourself. I suggest that people read blogs BECAUSE the blogs offer an individual viewpoint. No one person can ever have an omniscient completely neutral overview of anything. Any human observation is by necessity one-sided. Blogs share sides other than our own.

Some observations may have a higher bullshit factors than others if they come from individuals who choose to limit how well they function as a thinking being. Others, including yours even at your most cranky, can offer an interesting alternative world view. Your attitude may not be mine. I may or may not agree with your opinions about what you observe. But the one-sided view through your windows is certainly different from what I see out of mine, and might be just as rich in detail.”

I agree with much of this, but it really doesn’t apply here. The point I was trying to make is that I don’t want to be the one who’s trying to make the world see through the lens of a bullshitter. I’m not just talking about the written word here, either. What I’m saying is that even though there are aspects of my current situation with which I disagree in principle, the big picture puts the blame squarely on me.

As for the aspects “with which I disagree,” even these are kind of my doing because I’m the one who brought things to a point where anything turned into an actual “issue.” If I had behaved differently under the same circumstances, said aspects wouldn’t be issues at all. Trouble is, I differ with people in my life with regard to why this (the whole situation, from start to finish) has happened the way it has, and that’s what frustrates me.

The result, however, remains the same. Whether you got to Point Z by plane, train or automobile, you’re still at Point Z and your ride back just left town.

What I was getting at with that post was that it’s entirely self-serving – gratuitous, even – for someone to come out, after the fact, and offer some wacked-out version of events in order to either elicit sympathy or make themselves look better. I was going down that road in order to make myself feel better, was called on it – in the “real world” – and now it’s time to just back off and live my life.

Honestly? I wish somebody had wronged me, because then I’d have someone other than myself to focus this shit on.

I’ll be fine.